Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize