when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
