TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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