omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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