that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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