hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
