we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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