and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Randomize
