Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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