i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
