Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
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I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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