Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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