Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
