i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
