are you still at the devil's house?
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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