speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
