So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
