I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
