drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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