I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize