i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
May the power of my ass compel you!!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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