Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize