We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
