OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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