coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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