what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
