Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Randomize
