Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
