you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
