what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
