Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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