HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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