If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
