I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
