question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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