Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Randomize