Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
someone threw a dead crab at me
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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