Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
It's blow job season.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I think people are normalizing furries
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
