Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
We are two peas in an std pod
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
