okay pat passed out under dana's car
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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