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It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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