we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize