if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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