I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
