quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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