A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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