my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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