Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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