We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
