R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize