Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
